


Not a Joke This Time

by Sugar_Cube_Pancakes



Category: Gøøns (Podcast)
Genre: Confusion, Crying, Dom/sub, First Time, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Gay, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, Problematic Friends, Swearing, just read it, there's alcohol, they fight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 07:43:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27130100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sugar_Cube_Pancakes/pseuds/Sugar_Cube_Pancakes
Summary: Dooo arrives a day early to McNasty's and now they have to find a way to entertain themselves until the rest of their friends get there. Between the walls of jokes, name-calling, sexual tension, and Discord calls, will their true feelings for each other come to light in the absence of everyone else? And with these new feelings, will it bring them closer or tear them and their friends apart?~There will be a smut warning before each chapter!
Relationships: Eric | TheDooo/McNasty, mcnasty/thedooo
Comments: 14
Kudos: 34





	1. Chapter 1: Dooo is Early

**Author's Note:**

> This'll be in Dooo's perspective for the most part, but there may be a few chapters that are from McNasty's POV

I rolled up to McNasty's house with my suit case following behind me. He invited Soup, Blarg, Grizzy and me over for a week as a kind of vacation for no reason in particular it seems. His house was set in a pretty valley though, so I wasn't too mad about it.

Hopping up his front steps and reaching the door, I rang that stupid fucking musical bell and immediately heard Millie barking from inside, followed by McNasty shouting for her to be quiet. "What the fuck are you doing here?" He greeted upon opening the door. I had to tilt my head back a little to glare at him properly due to him being the size of a tree.

"You invited me here, idiot. Isn't everyone else here too?" McNasty crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame, eyeing me quizzically. 

"You weren't supposed to be here until tomorrow, idiot." He shot back. "You just don't know how to pay attention. But since you're here I guess you can come in." 

"I can come in? Darn I was really looking forward to sleeping outside." I said sarcastically as I entered his house. It was a pretty decently sized house comprised mostly of earthy tones with small splats of color in the décor and, honestly, it smelled exactly as I expected it would. "Nice place." I commented as I continued snooping around. 

"If you want I can take your stuff to my room. I have enough space for everyone to double up so you can either bunk with me or sleep on the couch." When McNasty spoke I was suddenly very aware of how close he was to me. Why did it make shivers go down my spine? Was it the proximity or was it just the thought of being in bed with him that made me nervous?

"Uh yeah I can stay with you or whatever. We can make Blarg sleep on the couch." We chuckled at my dumb attempt at a joke as he grabbed my bag and started for the stairs. I followed in suit and patted Millie on the head as we went. McNasty's room was surprisingly clean, considering I've always pictured his room being covered in Monster cans and beef stick wrappers with trash bags over the windows. While there were dark curtains and a singular Monster can on the desk, the made bed and swept carpet kind of threw me for a loop. "This is /your/ room?" I asked, feeling the soft brown comforter on his bed.

"Well yeah, you didn't think I was a huge slob did you?" He asked as he sat in his chair, man-spreading as he swiveled back and forth.

"Course not." I lied. My heart thumped in my chest as I looked at McNasty spread out like that. It almost seemed like a subtle invitation, but there's no way he'd be so smart as to have done that on purpose. Was he? "I'm hungry." I stated to avoid him noticing I was staring. He simply looked at me, smiled, and stood up. 

"Come on, Princess, lets go make dinner."

~Later, in the kitchen~

Clumsy by Fergie played loudly over the speaker McNasty set up in the kitchen as we cooked various breakfast foods for dinner. McNasty used his spatula for a microphone while flipping pancakes on the griddle and danced by moving side to side and wiggling his elbows. Despite him looking like one of those balloon things outside of car dealerships, I laughed and shook my hips to the beat along with him and worked on the eggs. "Dooo! Take it away!" He pointed to me, prompting me to take the chorus this time.

"You got me trippin,-" I sang, McNasty joining in for the "oh's" in the background. I danced along with him and continued to sing. "Clumsy 'cause I'm fallin' in love~" Taking my hand, McNasty spun me around in a circle to which, ironically, I tripped over my own foot and fell forward right into his arms. 

"Careful, Dooo." He laughed, both of us out of breath. I looked up at him. Fuck he looked so pretty. The way the kitchen light created a sort of halo effect around his head was perfect in adding to his angelic aura. Then he looked back at me and, when he noticed I was staring, his smile slowly faded. He didn't look away though. If anything it felt like he was getting closer to me. Fuck. He /was/ getting closer. He looked at my lips for a second before looking back in my eyes. 

Without thinking, I reached up to grab the back of his head and pulled him down to close the space between us. I stood back on my own two feet as we kissed, enjoying the way his hands trailed down and settled on my hips. After what felt like an eternity on an entirely different planet, we pulled away. "The eggs, McNasty!" I shouted, smelling the food burning on the stove. We both rushed and turned everything off, trying to save what we could of the food. 

As we sat and ate, the silence was almost as loud as our Siege sessions. "Are we gonna talk about what happened?" He asked, not looking up from his food. "Or was it just a heat-of-the-moment kind of thing?"

"What are you, some teenage girl?" I asked, trying to use a joke to avoid answering. "It was just a kiss."

"Was it, Dooo?" He asked, looking at me this time. He wasn't in his usual jokey mood. He was...serious. "If you didn't feel anything the least you could do is tell me so I can stop wasting my time thinking about you." My eyes went wide about that. Since when had he thought about me in that way? I knew he was a fanboy and we always made jokes about having sex with each other but was he...was he serious this whole time? Am I really that much of an idiot or is he really that good at hiding his true feelings through jokes? He dropped his fork to his plate, snapping me out of my train of thought. "I'm going to my room."

He walked away, obviously mad, and I couldn't blame him. I sat at the table just bouncing my knee and thinking. Thinking about all the jokes and the name calling. Thinking about the late night snapchats and calls. Thinking about all the sexual comments made during the podcast sessions. I didn't think he was ever serious about it, and I definitely did NOT ever think I would end up in this situation. Millie sat next to me and put her paw on my leg, probably her way of asking for food. "What am I gonna do, Millie? I don't even know how I feel about it. I mean, the kiss did feel nice, and it felt like I was out of the atmosphere when it was all happening." I put my head in my hands. "Fuck, Millie, I think I do have feelings for him...." The time for thinking about it was over. It was time to take action. 

Standing, I made my way to McNasty's room and knocked on the door. When there was no answer, I simply let myself in. To my surprise, he was just laying over the blankets on his bed. I figured he would've at least turned his computer on or something. "You good, bro?" I asked as I stood in the doorway. 

"Do you actually care or do you just not want me to be mad?" He asked, not turning around.

"I care and I don't want you to be mad at me. I'm sorry I didn't say anything, I guess I just never really though about you having serious feelings for me is all. We always joke about that kind of stuff and I guess it was just always a joke you wanted to do shit with me." I walked over to his bed and sat down on the edge with my back to him. "I never really stopped to consider if I had feelings for you or not either." He was quiet for a little bit and I offered him the peace to think it over. I never meant for him to get mad. 

"I guess I shouldn't have gotten mad to begin with. But I just don't want to be played around with. I know I'm an idiot but I do have feelings, and I'd rather take care of those feelings instead of letting them get hurt." I felt the bed shift as he got up and walked around the bed to where I was sitting. He towered over me normally, but now the height made it so my head was level with his crotch. The anticipation of what might happen made my skin flush, and I only hoped he didn't notice that right now. 

"I don't want to hurt your feelings. I want to take care of them and make you feel good things. If nothing else, you're still my friend, McNasty." I looked up at him as I stood, my body pressing up against his. I shyly took his hands in mine, tracing my thumb over the knuckles of his long fingers. "Maybe more than a friend." With that, he bent down and kissed me. This kiss was sweet and a little less unexpected than the last one, though it still took my breath away all the same. I reached my hand behind his head, lacing my fingers through his soft hair and pulling him closer to me. 

The kiss started getting more heated. His mouth moved against mine as his hands explored my back side, rubbing all over. McNasty grabbed my ass and I let out a small groan, pushing myself into him more. He pulled away, looking at me with an expression I've never seen on him before. Lust. Want. Need. It was a look that perfectly reflected how I was feeling. I stood on my toes and pressed my lips to his again in a way that I hoped let him know exactly what was on my mind.

Him.

"Are you sure you want this?" He asked, a little out of breath.

"I want you to make me your fucking bitch, McNasty." I nearly begged, holding onto his shirt like he would leave if I didn't.

"I've been waiting for this for so long." He smirked as he started undoing his belt. "Sit on the edge of the bed." I happily obliged, and he moved my knees apart with his and stood between my legs. I suddenly started to feel very very nervous. And this time, I knew he could tell. "Take my dick out and suck it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! This story is also in Wattpad under the username Justatadweird!


	2. Chapter 2: Things Get Smutty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here's the smut warning!

"W-what?" I stuttered, unsure if I had heard correctly.

"Take my dick out and suck it." McNasty ordered again. "Don't make me keep repeating myself, Princess." There was that fucking nickname again. But, in this context, it almost added to my arousal. Not wanting to test his patience just yet, I nervously undid McNasty's jean buttons, sliding the fabric down to pull out his dick. Sitting on the bed with him between my legs, I didn't have to lean forward very far before his dick was at the front of my mouth. Upon realizing how massive he was, a soft moan made its way from the back of my throat. "What's wrong?" McNasty asked, more sarcastically than out of concern. He knew exactly what I was thinking. 

"I didn't expect you to be so big..." I admitted, wrapping my hand around the others dick. Taking a breath and shaking my head to calm my nerves, I opened my mouth, letting McNasty slide in with ease and earning a small groan. He wrapped his hand around my head and gently pulled at the hair, which seemed like a small token of encouragement. I looked up, satisfied with the way McNasty's head was lolled back, and kept moving my head. Fuck he was so hot when he was like this. I moved my tongue along his shaft with my mouth still wrapped around it, making sure to get as much as I could without making myself gag. 

"Stand up." McNasty pulled me up and helped me take my clothes off, leaving me in nothing but boxers before letting me sit back down to continue. As my mouth worked his dick, McNasty trailed his hands all over my skin. Back, ass, shoulders, head, back. The way his fingers trailed gently over my skin sent shivers down my spine. He definitely knew what he was doing. Deciding to be a little braver, I took him half way down my throat before the need to gag made me panic. "Fuck." He moaned, grabbing my hair a little harder and holding me there a second longer. 

"I really want to fuck that cute little ass of yours." He admitted when I pulled away. 

"Then do it." I smirked up at him. I stood up and finished helping him undress before turning us around and pushing him back onto the bed. I climbed on top of the tree of a man and kissed him; reaching down to stroke his cock underneath me as he reached out behind me to play with my ass. My face scrunched at the new sensation. It burned a little, but it wasn't anything too horrible. It mostly felt like reverse shitting, if I was shitting out a yo-yo. 

"You're so tight. Are you sure you can handle it?" He asked, a sly smile playing across his lips.

"I'm sure. I can take it." I smiled back. He reached up to his bedside drawer and pulled out a small bottle of what I can only assume to be lube.

"Ah, so you're prepared I see." I joked, taking the bottle out of his hand. 

"I figured I'd try and help make your first time as comfortable for you as possible. I figured something like this was gonna happen so I thought I'd be prepared." I nodded in understanding before opening the bottle and squirting a generous amount onto the head of his dick before rubbing it over his shaft with my hand. "Wait," he grabbed the lube out of my hand "you'll need it too." Putting a little of the gel onto his fingers, he reached under me and applied it to my hole, slowly sliding his fingers in. "Does that feel better?" He asked. I could only nod in response. "Fuck, Dooo. Switch me." Without warning, he grabbed my hips and flipped us over so I was laying on my back and his towered over me between my legs.

McNasty grabbed his dick and slapped it against mine a few times before grinding against me, slick cock rubbing right where I was aching to be fucked. Words couldn't describe how badly I wanted him in this moment. It was almost torturous. "Please-" I whined, lightly grabbing onto his arm. 

"Please what, Princess?" He asked with an unforgiving smile.

"Please fuck me, McNasty." I begged. McNasty grabbed my hands and put them over my head. 

"Hold onto the headboard and do not let go of it. Understand?" I nodded. He then grabbed my legs and put them over his shoulders, prodding my entrance with his dick. "Ready?"

"Yes." I breathed. Sliding into me, my initial realization was finally happening. He was massive compared to me, and it turns out he's massive in more ways than one. Without warning, he thrusted into me hard; my hand shooting up to my mouth instinctively to suppress the moan that escaped my throat.

"Don't move your hands." He warned, looking at me with a cocked eyebrow.

"I'm sorry, Sir." I corrected myself. Fuck, what's come over me?

"Good boy." McNasty kissed me, moving his dick slowly in and out of me. 

"Fuck, you feel so good, Eric." I moaned, wanting so badly to touch him. He smiled and stared moving his hips faster. 

"Flip over, ass up." He ordered, pulling out and smacking my ass. I did as I was told, careful not to move my hands too far from the headboard. With my ass fully exposed and my head in the pillows, my face burned out of embarrassment. What if I wasn't how he expected me to be? What if he didn't like what he saw? "Relax, Dooo. It's okay." McNasty laid over me and gently kissed from my shoulder down my back. "Fuck you're so hot." He groaned, putting his face between my cheeks.

"Ah~" I moaned as I felt his warm tongue swipe over my hole before going in. I heard the sound of him jacking off as he ate me out and, without thinking, I reached back and laced my fingers in his hair. He stopped, pulling back and smacking my ass.

"I told you not to move, Princess." He said, smacking the other side. "Guess I'm just going to have to teach you how to listen." I felt my body temperature rise in anticipation. "Get up, stand up on the edge of the bed." I did as I was told and he stood up on the floor, making me a little taller than he was. "Put your legs around my shoulders. I'm going to go over to the door, and you're going to hold onto the frame and not let go. Understand?"

"Are you sure about this? It seems a little dangerous." I asked as I put one leg around his shoulder. 

"You'll be fine. Just do as I say and it'll be okay." I hesitantly brought my other leg around his other shoulder, suddenly feeling too heavy for him. But he held on to me and walked to the doorway of the bathroom, and I held on to it. McNasty snaked his hand around my thigh and stroked my aching dick, looking up at me as he licked from the bottom of the shaft to the tip of the head. I shivered in pure delight and had to look away before I disobeyed him again. I remember him saying on a podcast he wanted to pick me up and suck my cock above his head, and now it was finally happening. Truth be told, I responded like it was a joke, but the thought of it genuinely made me hard. Though when we were like this, it was proving to be a little difficult to get me into his mouth, so he opted for sucking my balls instead. I dared to look down and almost nutted at the sight. My hard dick was laying across his face and he was just looking at me with eyes that glistened with faux innocent and dominance. He was in complete control, and I had zero problems letting him stay in control.

"Please fuck me." I begged, leaning my head against the wall above the door. "I promise I won't move my hands unless you say so must please fuck me, McNasty." I felt him smile against my balls.

"As you wish, Princess." With that, he walked back over to the bed, knelt down slightly, and let me fall back onto it with a soft /thud/. My legs hung over the bed, and he grabbed them and pulled my ass against him before putting his dick back in me. I kept my hands above my head and didn't try to hide my sounds anymore. I moaned like a bitch as he thrusted in a hard but steady rhythm, holding my legs back just under the knees. 

"Fuck, McNasty, please don't stop." I whined, gripping the sheets behind my head. He simply let go of my right leg and put his hand around my throat; squeezing slightly and making me gasp in surprise. 

"You like that? You like being choked while I'm railing your ass, Princess?" He asked in a breathlessly aggressive manner.

"Yes." I managed, feeling myself nearing the edge. "I-I'm gonna, oh fuck~" 

"You can move your hands, Princess. Cum for me." He bent down and kissed me hard, moving his hand from my throat to my dick as my hands shot into his hair and pulled tight, gripping onto him as I passed through several planes of pure ecstasy and came into his hand before feeling him drain himself deep inside my ass.

We were both a panting, sweaty mess, but that didn't stop him from planting soft little kisses over my neck and chest before he stood up and walked away. I felt his hot cum start to trail out of my hole and soak the sheets under me. "You'd better hurry before I ruin your sheets." I smiled, watching him as he brought back a towel from the bathroom. 

"It's okay, they'll wash." McNasty knelt between my legs and wiped his mess up before helping me into my boxers. "Ready for bed?"

"Can we watch a movie first?" I asked, walking over to his drawer to pick out a shirt to wear. I opted for one of his merch hoodies that was at the top of his drawers. It was like a little dress on me and for once I understood why girls liked wearing their mans hoodies all the time.

"Of course. Come here." McNasty smiled at me as he rolled back the sheets and curled up into bed with me. 

It wasn't long before I started drifting off to sleep. I know we're gonna have to tell our friends about us at some point, but for some reason, the thought of them knowing was scary. How would they react to it? Would they be happy for us? Or will they hate us?

I guess we'll just find out tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 3: Problematic Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's implied smut but nothing as heavy as the last chapter

I woke up with the light of day pouring in around the bedroom windows and McNasty's arm wrapped around me. The warmth of his body pressed against mine felt nice in comparison to the cold of the room. I made sure not to move around too much just so I didn't wake him up, but I did cuddle into him a little more. 

I guess we had to figure out how to tell our friends about us. But, we should also figure out if there is even an "us" to tell them about. How would they even react? Would they care? We've joked about being gay for so long, would they even be surprised at this point? I mean, they've joined in the conversations and Soup literally told someone that McNasty was his husband. The only one I really worry about is Blarg. He acts fine with the jokes but I worry about how he's gonna react when it's the real deal. 

"Morning, Princess." McNasty yawned from behind me, wrapping his other arm around me from under the pillows. 

"I'm surprised you're awake already." 

"I could feel you over-thinking already. Are you nervous?"

"Terrified." I admitted. "What about you? What are we even gonna tell them?"

McNasty shrugged behind me. "I'm not too worried about it. Honestly I don't even think they're gonna believe us. I guess we can tell them we fucked? Unless...." The pause piqued my interest enough that I turned around in his arms and propped myself up on my elbow to look at him. His bed-head looked so cute in the morning light.

"Unless what?"

"Unless...you wanna tell them we're dating?" My heart beat faster in my chest. I knew we were going to end up dating, I suppose I didn't have time to think too hard about it. I was too busy getting railed.

"I don't know, man. Seems kinda gay to me." I sighed and shrugged, trying my best to suppress the smile that was creeping onto my face. McNasty scrunched up his face; looking at the ceiling and then at me.

"And you taking my dick up your ass isn't?" He asked as a smile started to spread across his face. 

"I don't remember that part." I sighed, crawling on top of McNasty and straddling his hips. "Are you sure that happened?" I felt his bare cock twitch against my naked ass. A small soreness poked at my lower back, but I didn't pay that much attention to it.

McNasty rubbed his hands up my thighs and around my hips, looking me up and down. "Pretty sure. If you're having a hard time remembering, maybe I can help jog your memory." 

~Later, in the kitchen again~

I stood in the kitchen in my boxers wearing one of McNasty's hoodies that was a little too big for me. McNasty was wearing a pair of grey sweats but remained shirtless, pouring cereal and milk into two bowls. "Here you go, babe." He smirked as he handed me a bowl and a spoon. 

"Thanks, babe. I appreciate you." I winked before taking a bite of the cereal. "Do you know when the boys are gonna get here?" 

"In a few hours I think." He shrugged. "I haven't gotten a text from them or anything yet." 

We ate in silence. It wasn't uncomfortable though. I enjoyed being around him more than I thought I would. This trip was already started to be more than I ever expected it to be. Then again, I never thought I'd be dating McNasty or getting railed by him either. Just as we finished up, there was a knock at the door.

"Coming!" McNasty shouted over Millie's barking, slapping my ass on the way to the door. The knocking continued and was paired with the doorbell being run repeatedly. "I said I'm coming, calm the fuck down!"

"It's about time you opened the door, dude!" I heard Soup's voice at the door first, followed by Grizzy and Blarg laughing. "Dooo here yet?"

"In the kitchen!" I called, putting my bowl in the sink. Everyone piled in to the kitchen and McNasty stood by my side, leaning against the counter. "You guys are early."

"We're not the ones who were a day early, Dooo." Blarg laughed, setting his stuff on the floor. Seeing everyone made my heart jump around in my chest. I wondered how long it would be before they became problematic friends.

"What'd you two queens do while we weren't here?" Grizzy asked with a huge smile.

"Probably fuckin', what else?" Soup answered. McNasty grinned knowingly at me as my face burned up. I turned around to busy myself with dishes in hopes the others wouldn't notice. 

That day, we went around town and McNasty showed us some of his favorite places to go to before we headed to the mall. We split up for a while, Soup going with me and McNasty to Spencer's, and Grizzy and Blarg went off into the game store. 

Soup looked at the wallet rack while McNasty and I looked at the circle rack of shirts by the lingerie section. "Fuck, you'd look so good in that red one on the wall." He joked, pointing to a mannequin torso in a red Victorian lace bustier. 

"Nah, I don't think I have the boobs for it." I shrugged, grabbing my chest for emphasis. He just laughed and walked away too look at something else while I picked out a band shirt and went to the register with Soup. 

As we walked out, we noticed McNasty wasn't with us. "Where'd he go?" Soup asked, looking around. As if on que, McNasty walked out with a small bag in one hand and his phone in the other. 

"Blarg and Grizzy are hungry and said to meet them by the front. " He announced, leading the way. I walked beside him, trying to peek into the bag to see what he got. "Later." He winked down at me when Soup wasn't paying attention.

"McNasty, I swear, if you bought that lingerie-"

"I didn't, I promise." He assured, putting his arm around my shoulder for a brief moment. "But you will like it. Trust me." I nodded up to him as we neared where Blarg and Grizzy where.

"There you are. Let's go eat!"

~Later~

The hum of the bar and grill we decided on distracted me from thinking too much as we ate. Well, it distracted me from McNasty rubbing his leg against mine. We all ate and laughed and caught up on our lives. I guess they all met up at the airport and took an Uber to get to McNasty's rather than coming at separate times. Everything felt right for once, even if McNasty and I kinda were keeping a huge secret from the rest of them. He has been looking at me quite a lot tonight though. Maybe they've noticed? Have they figured it out already?

"Dooo?" Blarg's voice snapped me out of thought.

"What?" 

"I said McNasty's room is pretty trashed isn't it? Covered in trash and toxic waste?"

I just shrugged. "It's actually pretty clean. I was really surprised that there wasn't some six-eyed fish with legs eating a goat in the corner when I got there." That got me a laugh from the table and a smiling "fuck you" from McNasty.

We finished up and McNasty and I walked at the back of the group, hand-in-hand. We were silent the car ride home, knowing we'd have to tell them once we got home. 

My heart beat in my chest as we walked up the steps, McNasty going first to unlock the doors. "Hey guys, can you sit in the living room please? I need to talk to you all about something." He looked the same as always, but there was a seriousness about him now that made me nervous as all hell. Blarg, Soup, and Grizzy went and sat in the living room, but I stayed outside for a second longer.

"You sure about this?" I asked, letting my nervousness show. 

"They're our friends, Dooo. They'll be okay. Even if they aren't, I'd rather be with you anyways." He smiled reassuringly at me before placing a delicate kiss on my lips and walking inside. 

"Everything good, bro?" Grizzy asked as I sat next to him on the couch. I nodded and McNasty moved the coffee table towards the TV so he could stand in front of all of us. 

"Okay, so, there's really no need for this much build up because honestly it's not even that big of a deal. Well, it is, but it's not like its going to hurt anyone or something like that. Basically..." In one swift movement, he leaned to me, grabbed my arm, and pulled me up to stand with him. "Dooo isn't a virgin anymore."

There was a pause. A pause that shouldn't have been as long as it was. All three of our friends faces went from confusion, to surprise, then right as they opened their mouths to say something, noticed McNasty had my hand wrapped in his, and their faces lit up one by one as the lightbulbs switched on. 

"Wait...you guys?" Blarg pointed between us. "Are you two?"

"Yes." I answered.

Silence. They all looked between each other. Blarg was the first to start laughing, and the rest of us nervously chuckled along with him. 

"You guys are funny. You almost had me fooled for a second!" He stood up and put his hand on my shoulder. "Nice try, but we're not that dumb. Now I'm going to bed, so goodnight." I tried to stop him but McNasty squeezed my hand to let it go. Grizzy followed Blarg to the spare bedroom and Soup got out a blanket to sleep on the couch. McNasty and I just went into his room a laid on the bed in the darkness.

"That...could've gone better." I spoke up first. "Maybe...a lot better?"

"Yeah, it could've. What're we gonna do?" He asked, turning his head to me. 

"We could bang one out and see if they believe us then." I suggested as I sat up and let my hand roam under his shirt. 

McNasty's lips were back on mine. I've longed for this all damn day. To just have him with me, to have him feel me, and to just feel him. It's not fault he looked so irresistible in those grey pants. We fucked, and we went hard. I made sure to be a little extra loud just in case they had any doubts of what was going on. It wasn't a great plan, but we didn't have any better ideas.

Unfortunately, it was probably the worst decision we could've made.


	4. Chapter 4: The Fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter contains homosexual slang being used as an insult! If you find this offensive, I'm very sorry! There's also mentions of blood, but nothing too graphic!

The next morning, we all sat in silence and ate breakfast. Blarg wasn't downstairs yet.

"Did you two...have fun last night?" Soup asked, trying to ease the elephant in the room.

"We did. Dooo's got a nice, tight ass." McNasty stated very plainly. Soup nodded in understanding before returning to his cereal.

"We tried to tell you." I shrugged, not looking up from my bowl. "But nope, you guys didn't believe us."

Grizzy spoke up. "Soup and I believed you plenty, it's Blarg who has the issue." McNasty looked confusedly at him.

"Really?" 

"Yep. I don't understand why, though. It's not like he should be surprised." He shrugged. I looked at McNasty, who looked at me, and we both looked back at Grizzy. 

"Did he say anything else?" I asked.

"No. After he went to bed that was kind of the end of it. Until we heard you guys going to pound town. Then he was just kinda pissed the rest of the night." It's as if my worst assumptions were coming true. Blarg hates us now. I knew this would happen. Before I could say anything else, Blarg walked into the kitchen with his suitcase. "Where are you going?"

"Fucking leaving, Grizzy." Blarg barked. "I'm not staying here."

"Don't be a bitch, Blarg, just come eat some cereal with us." McNasty rolled his eyes and started to get a bowl down.

"I'd rather eat a bowl of fucking shit than eat anything in this house. I need to leave." Blarg glared at the back of McNasty's head.

I don't know where, maybe it was just the way he was looking at my man, but I got a sudden burst of angry energy. I'll be damned if he's gonna talk to McNasty like that. "Blarg, quit being a fucking asshole. He was just offering you cereal. I don't understand why you're so pissed off about this."

"Jee, Dooo, I don't know, maybe because I had to listen to two queers fucking all night."

My face burned. "Okay, maybe that wasn't the best way to try and convince you that we were together. But you know what? We shouldn't even have to convince you of anything. Maybe if you wouldn't have made us think everyone here thought it was a huge joke McNasty and I were pulling, then it wouldn't have gotten to that. It's not our fault you're a homophobic piece of shit."

Blarg dropped his suitcase and stepped closer to me. "How could I not think it was a joke? Literally you two joke about it all the fucking time. Why would this be any different? I think you two have just joked about it too much that now you're confused."

Soup and Grizzy huffed to say something, but McNasty got there first. "Just shut the fuck up, Blarg. Leave if you want, but shut the fuck up. You have no idea how Dooo and I feel about each other."

"No, I am leaving, McNasty." Blarg took a step back to his suitcase, not breaking eye contact with the towering man. "I wouldn't wanna be around you or your fa*got boyfriend anymore, anyways."

Oh fuck.

McNasty slammed his bowl to the counter, causing glass and everything else to go flying everywhere. He lunged towards Blarg, throwing all of his weight into a right hook that landed right on Blarg's nose. "YOU GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE AND DON'T EVER FUCKING COME BACK!" He screamed, face pure red with anger. Blarg stood straight, examining the blood on his hand before swinging back at McNasty, causing the other to lunge at him. 

Arms and fists were flying. I've never seen McNasty more angry than right then. We let them go for a second, too stunned at what we were seeing to do anything. Blood splattered on the floor, and I flew towards the two to try and get them apart. I only succeeded in getting shoved back into the island, and that's when Grizzy and Soup got up and rushed over. Blarg and McNasty were screaming at each other as Soup pulled McNasty one way and Grizzy pulled Blarg the other. 

"You fucking morons! Queers! Fucking all of you!" Blarg screamed as Grizzy practically carried him out the door.

"I'll send you a postcard from your dad's asshole you fucking c*nt!" McNasty shouted back before Grizzy shut and locked the door behind Blarg. "Let me go!" He jerked out of Soup's grip and started for the stairs. I looked at Soup, trying not to let him see the tears that were pooling at my eyes. 

"Go ahead, we'll clean this up." He gestured to the blood on the ground and I only nodded before rushing to McNasty's room with him.

He already had his shirt off and the water running when I got to his bathroom. I stood at the doorway for a second, unsure if he even wanted me to come in. 

"You okay?" I asked quietly. 

"I'm fine. Perfect, actually." He was mad, but he wasn't being sarcastic. I walked beside him and instructed him to sit while I ran the cloth under the warm water. He sat, wincing when I went to clean the blood off his nose. "I can't believe him. I thought he was so different than that."

"You didn't have to punch him." I stated calmly, rinsing the blood off before going to clean more off his face.

"You heard what he called you. What he called us. It's bad enough he was yelling at you, I wasn't gonna let him call you a -"

"I'm not glass, McNasty." I interrupted. Hearing it once was hard enough, I didn't even want to imagine him saying it too. "I know how to handle myself."

"I know. But you're mine now, Dooo. I want to take care of you, and I don't want anyone talking to you like that. Ever." 

"We talk like that to each other when we play Siege." I smiled, making him huff a laugh in return.

"Well, that's different. We don't mean it, and we've never said it out of anger. And certainly never to hurt each other." I guess he was right. I'd never admit that aloud, but he was right. 

"What's gonna happen now?" I asked, finishing cleaning the last off his face off.

"Well," He started, pulling me into his lap. "we are going to enjoy our week vacation with our two real friends, and I'm going to love the fuck out of you for the rest of our lives. Even longer if that's how it should be. And no one is ever, ever going to make me stop loving you, Dooo." I kissed him, almost ready to cry again from the absolute joy this man brought me. 

"I love you too, McNasty."


	5. Chapter 5: Impaired Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys get Dooo absolutely trashed and Blarg returns. What could possibly go wrong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~Pot and alcohol use ahead~

Tensions were still at an all time high, so what better way to ease our frustrations than with alcohol and drugs? No one had heard from Blarg since the fight a few days ago and, honestly, no one seemed to care that much. McNasty hurt from it in a way I didn't quite understand. He hurt from losing a friend, but he seems okay with it since the friend was kind of a huge asshole. 

McNasty took me to get the liquor while Soup and Grizzy went to get the pot. When we got to the liquor store, I was amazed by all the different kinds there were. "Alright," McNasty said to himself while he started pulling things from the shelves. "we need this, that, definitely some of those. Ooo how about this?" He held up a pink and blue bottle of blue raspberry vodka. "This is amazing with Mountain Dew."

"Get whatever, man, I'm just here for the ride." I bit my lip nervously. Were we really gonna drink all of that? 

"Yeah and you're pretty good at it." He slapped my ass, laughing. I blushed and looked around to make sure no one saw it. But, as luck would have it, someone did.

"Fuck, can't you keep it in your house?" The voice made both of us stop cold. McNasty turned around, ready to say something, but I saw his face drop down as soon as he saw who it was.

"I'm surprised they let you in here. Pretty sure I saw a 'no dogs allowed' sign on the door." He shot back.

"Go drink plan milk and color, McNasty." Blarg rolled his eyes, grabbing a bottle off the shelf and heading up front. He looked like hell. His hair was all scruffed up and his eyes were red. It looked like he'd be crying for a while. McNasty turned to me and shuffled me into an isle toward the back.

"Hey, he looked kinda rough, didn't he?" I asked, trying to diffuse the situation.

"So what? He got his shit rocked, I hope he looks like it too."

"I just...I think we need to try and make things right. He's our friend." McNasty scrunched his face at me.

"Seriously?? After everything that happened, and what he said, you still want to be friends with that jackoff?"

"Maybe he's just confused or something about the whole situation and needed to process it, you know? We didn't really expect everyone to coddle us and have open arms, did we?" No answer. He just silently looked over the bottles, but I could tell that he wasn't really reading the labels. He was thinking real hard. "Well, you think about it, I'm going to invite him back to the house. If you don't want to make things right, then I'll go drink with him instead. Maybe he's changed his mind about the whole thing and is just too proud to admit he was wrong." When McNasty didn't stop me, I made my way to Blarg at the front. There's no harm in asking, right?

"What do you want, Dooo?" He asked, not looking at me.

"We're gonna get trashed tonight. Want to join us?"

"I'd rather drink alone in my room, thanks." Fuck he was bitter. "You can leave now."

"Come off it, Matt." I shoved his shoulder so he'd look at me. "You look like shit. Plus, I imagine partying with friends will be more fun than sitting in a hotel room all night. Don't you think? If nothing else, maybe we can come out of this all friends again and things can go back to how they used to be."

"Except you and McNasty will be fucking all the time."

"Well, yes, but it won't be like last time. Last time we were just trying to prove a point, but it was an awful way to go about it and I'm sorry." No answer. "Please, Blarg?"

He thought for a little bit and I saw his expression soften a little. "Okay, fine. But only because I wanna see you fucked up." I saw the smallest hint of a smile creep onto his face. McNasty came up just as Blarg finished with his transaction.

"He's coming and you're gonna be nice about it." I warned.

~That night, in the living room~

"So, what's the point of this game?" I asked as McNasty poured whiskey into four shot glasses, handing one to each of us. Blarg wasn't there yet.

"It's Never Have I Ever, Dooo. We take turns naming something we haven't done, and if you have done it, you take the shot. First to ten loses." Grizzy explained. "For instance, never have I ever...fucked McNasty."

"Wait what?! That's not fair!" I whined. 

"Well I've never done it, so it is. Drink up, pussy!" Grizzy laughed as I downed the shot. I made the mistake of holding it in my mouth instead of drinking it right away. The burning sensation almost made me spit it out, but I drank it anyways.

"My turn, my turn." McNasty announced as he poured more into my glass. "Never have I ever wrote a song that goes 'do do do, do do do do do'." He sang Ascend and I took my shot.

Soup was next. "Never have I ever had a boyfriend!" McNasty and I both took our shots. This one didn't burn as bad, but I was starting to feel it behind my eyes. The rounds continued with me-specific answers and I ended up drinking 10 shots.

"All of you suck ass dick." I mumbled, setting my glass on the table. Then, like a sound from above, the door bell rang. "I'll get it!" I announced, standing and immediately regretting it. My entire world spun beneath my feet as I became hyperaware of the weight of my head. I fumbled, but caught myself and trotted to the door. "Blarg! Blarg, buddy, come in! Come in!" I ushered him in the door. "Guys, Blarg is here! Isn't that nice?"

As Blarg waved awkwardly he was met with stares of various emotions. "Um, I brought dark rum...." He held up a bottle and I took it from him, trotting back to my boyfriend and handing him the bottle before plotting down on the floor.

"We're gonna mix drinks and smoke! Come sit with us!" I patted the floor next to me as McNasty started to roll some joints. "You HAVE to try this raspberry vodka and mountain dew!" I took a glass and poured some of each liquid into it before sliding it to Blarg. The room was quiet, but I couldn't understand why. Blarg was here. Aren't we supposed to be having fun?

"Thanks...." Blarg took it and sipped it a little, sitting next to me on the floor. Grizzy and Soup mixed their own drinks and I made myself a drink like Blarg's. The sweetness of the soda was a nice contrast to the whiskey I was drinking not too long ago. My body felt heavy, but my brain was buzzing with excitement. My mouth felt like when my feet trip over themselves, but everyone still understood me. "Dooo, are you drunk already?"

I giggled. "Noooo, Blarg. Okay, maybe a little bit. I just had like 600 shots in a VERY UNFAIR game of Never Have I Ever." I started drinking again, but mid-gulp I remembered why Blarg was here and almost choked on my drink. "BLARG!" I gasped, setting my drink down. "I know why you're here!"

"Yeah, you invited me." He started to laugh.

"No, well yes, but I wanted all of us to be friends again!" I looked at Soup and Grizzy, who had a smile on their face, but they weren't looking at us. "Guys, come on, so Blarg was kinda shitty for a few minutes. So what? We've been friends for like 500 years, we've had so much fun together, and I'm SURE he just needed some time to think about things. Right, Blarg?" I looked back at him, but he was absolutely inHALING his drink. 

"Dooo, just put this in your mouth." McNasty put a joint in my mouth and lit the other end, telling me to inhale but not swallow. I did as I was told, exhaling and coughing. I coughed and my head pounded and coughed more. "There you go, Princess." I caught him sneaking a challenging glance at Blarg when he used my pet name. I did another inhale of the blunt before handing it back to my man.

I felt fuzzy. My skin felt like a TV and my insides felt like the TV static. It wasn't bad though. My anxiety and fears and everything else just seemed to go away. The more I drank, the less I felt. Well, I felt happy. I felt excited. Pretty soon, my friends were all laughing with each other again, which made me even happier. But, in the middle of all the excitement, I got hungry. "McNastyyyyy~" I sang, falling into him with my head on his shoulder. "McNasty I'm hungryyyy."

"What do you want, Princess?" He asked, holding me in place on the floor while he stood up behind me.

I thought for a second, looking up at him. He was so tall. He looked like an angel, with the lights coming down around his head. Without breaking eye contact, I got onto my knees and slumped against his legs before he helped me stand up on my feet. I swayed. I felt huge. Like I was the size of a building. "I want eggs. Scrambled, with pepper." I finally answered, gently pushing him aside and making my way into the kitchen. My legs felt like I was trying to walk with someone else's legs and I kept running into walls. In the kitchen, I pulled out some pans and opened the fridge to pull out the eggs. 

"You are absolutely not making them alone." I felt a hand on the small of my back and my eggs started leaving my hand. Turning, McNasty was standing there. 

"I can do it myself." I pouted, scrunching my face at him.

"No way. Let me help you." He turned me around and walked me to the stove, turning it on and putting a pan on it. "I'll put the eggs on and you flip it. Okay?" I nodded in response, leaning back into him. He cracked six eggs into the pan, handing me a spatula to stir it.

"Fuck you smell so good." I groaned, leaning my head back to look at him. "Kiss me." With a small smile on his face, he leaned down and kissed my lips. 

"Keep an eye on the eggs." He said simply, kissing my forehead. I turned my attention back to the eggs, stirring and flipping them. McNasty rubbed my back and shoulders. 

"Done!" I announced, turning the stove off. "Plate please!" On que, a plate appeared by my hand! It might've just been McNasty, but I can believe it was magic. He helped me put the eggs onto the plate and we went back into the living room with everyone else. We sat, I ate, and we laughed. I wasn't really paying attention to the conversation, but I got sick of the eggs about half way through. 

"Blarg I have a question." McNasty started, finishing the drink in his hand. "Why did you flip out when you found out about Dooo and me?" My heart strings did a flip and I looked at Blarg. No doubt it had been a question on my mind. Why did he freak out?

"Can't we just let it go?" He asked, not looking at him. 

"I think its a pretty fair question, Blarg." Soup said. Blarg was silent.

"Blarg, we just wanna know like what's up. Like why did you freak out?" I said, patting his shoulder.

"Just fucking let it go!" He raised his voice, shoving my hand off him. 

"What's your fucking problem?!" I shouted, my good mood immediately over. "You're the one who called me and McNasty the f word, you jerk! I invite you over to try and make amends but you cant even tell us that the fuck is your problem??"

"It's because I'm jealous, alright?!" Blarg screamed. "I've had a crush on McNasty for fucking forever, and he asks YOU to be his boyfriend! I didn't even think he liked dudes, and right when I finally think I'm fucking over him, I find out you two are fucking! Not only that, but DATING!"

We were all silent. What warm static filled my body was now replaced with cold static that didn't care about me. It made my body feel twice as heavy and my brain was starting to get the anxiety back. I felt rain on my hand, but upon further inspection, it was tears falling from my face onto my hands in my lap. Why was I crying? I looked over at McNasty, but he was crying too. Blarg was crying. Soup and Grizzy just looked between all of us in shock. McNasty stood up and went towards the stairs, and Blarg got up and locked himself in the bathroom. I looked between Soup and Grizzy for answers, but I got none.

"Do you just...wanna play another game?" Soup suggested, clearing off a space of the coffee table. 

"We can do that." Grizzy agreed, going to look at McNasty's game collection.

"Yeah, I think he needs some space right now." I wiped the tears off my face and finished the rest of my drink.

About half way through the game, I looked up at the stairs for a second to see the last second of Blarg going up them. He was probably just going to get his bags again.

He brought his bags in, didn't he?


	6. Chapter 6: Dooo Can't Know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is in McNasty's POV. It's also pretty short, but the next chapter will be longer!

I laid in my bed, unable to believe what I'd just heard. I can't believe Matt has a crush on me. I rubbed my head in my hands, letting them flop back onto the bed after. There was a quiet knock at the door, and I assumed it was Dooo. I shouldn't have left him down there, but I just didn't want to fight anymore. Dooo didn't want us to fight anymore. The look on his face after Blarg admitted his feelings was just...how to I even describe it? He looked so shocked and sad. I felt awful for even putting him in that situation. The door to my room opened and I sat up. "Come here." I said softly to the dark, patting my lap.

"Relax, it's me." Blarg's voice answered, a light turning on after. "You should really keep your lights on."

"I don't have to do shit in my own house if I don't want to." I snapped, scooting over so Blarg could sit down. "What do you want?"

"I want to apologize. For everything." He sighed, sitting down. "I shouldn't have called you guys a...well, you know. I went too far."

"Yeah, you did."

"I was just upset. I didn't know how to react. I wanted to believe you guys were just joking about it, and I got so pissed when I heard you fucking him." He wiped the tears from his eyes before they fell down his face. 

"You shouldn't have overreacted. If you would've said what you were feeling from the start, all of this could have been avoided." I looked away. I don't know why this was making me so upset. It wasn't like I felt the same way about him. I've always had a crush on Dooo, though I've always hid it behind jokes. I don't want to give up what I just got after wanting it for so long. "Can we just...be more honest with each other from now on?" I looked at him.

"Super honest?" He asked, looking at me. Something about the shift in the air made me tense up. 

"Well, yeah, that's what being honest means I guess-" In what seemed like a flash of light, Blarg's lips were on mine. His eyes were closed, but mine were wide opened. I didn't know what to do. He pulled away and looked me in the eyes. There was a pause, long enough for me to register what was happening, and when he leaned in to kiss me again I shoved him away. "Dude!"

"What?" He asked, looking genuinely confused. 

"I'm in a relationship, Blarg, you can't just fucking kiss me like that!" I hissed, not wanting to risk anyone downstairs hearing us. 

"Dooo doesn't have to know." He whispered, running his hand up my thigh. I moved it away before he touched my dick.

"No, Matt, that's not the problem. I'm in a relationship with Dooo, and I want to be in a relationship with Dooo for a while. Maybe even forever. But for now, I'm not going to do anything to fuck it up." I got up and he stood up with me, moving in front of me and holding onto my shirt. He didn't say anything, and I didn't do anything. He just looked me up and down and I just stared down him.

"That's how you really feel about him?" He asked.

"Yes." I answered, moving him out of the way and walking to the door. "Look, you can stay the night if you want, but I don't want you here any longer than that."

"What about Dooo? He wanted us to start getting along again. What'll he say if I leave?" He sat back on the bed, sitting with one leg over the other and a cocky attitude I was NOT in the mood for.

"Tell him your hotel won't cancel your stay until your flight, tell him things are too tense to stay here. You make up a lie, you make up a fucking reason, but you are not staying here. And he can't know you kissed me. Ever." I sounded a little more threatening than I meant, but I didn't care. I didn't want him here if he can't respect me or Dooo enough to not fucking make a move. 

"I won't tell him. Maybe."

"I'm not playing games, Matt. Just don't tell him. It's as easy as that." He got up and walked over to me. "Please."

"Fine. He might beat my ass if he finds out anyways. He did go out of his way to apologize, so consider this returning the favor, McNasty." He opened the door and started walking out. I grabbed his arm, not convinced he wouldn't keep his mouth shut.

"I mean it, Matt." I warned.

"I know, Eric. Dooo can't know." With that, he left my room and shut himself up in the spare bedroom and I locked myself in mine.

A few hours later, Dooo stumbled in in a better mood. "McNastyyy, I'm coming to bed~" He sang, starting to take off his clothes. I smiled at him. His face was dusted in a pink blush, no doubt from everything he drank and smoked. I laid on my back, opening the covers for him. 

"Come over here then, Princess." I patted beside me. He stumbled over and flipped off the spot I patted.

"Fuck that, I wanna lay on you." He laid over top of me, head on my chest. "Ah, you're so warm." I felt him smile and snuggle into me more. "Did you talk to Blarg?" My heart stopped for a second. 

"I saw him, but he's in the other room." I yawned, hoping that would make the both of us tired.

"Okay. I'm glad we're all friends again." He yawned back. "Goodnight, McNasty, you perfect human."

"I'm not perfect, Dooo."

"Of course you aren't, but that doesn't make me think any differently." I planted a soft kiss on the top of his head.

"Goodnight, Dooo."

"Night, McNasty."


	7. Chapter 7: The Morning After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is still in McNasty's POV

I woke up with Dooo curled up against my front. He was holding onto my arm that was under his head and my other arm was draped around his chest, snoring slightly. Thoughts of last nights events played out in my mind before I had a chance to stop them. 

Dooo invited Blarg back.

Blarg came back and drank with us.

Things were fun, at least for a few hours while we were drinking and playing games.

Dooo got fucked up. More than any of us had ever seen him. And we smoked too, which was a first for him. He was so cute, fumbling around and wanting everyone to have a good time. I helped him make eggs that he didn't even finish.

I asked a simple question and Blarg blew up at us.

Blarg confessed he had feelings for me.

I went to my room.

Blarg came in.

Blarg kissed me. 

Fuck, Blarg kissed me. He fucking kissed me. Not only that, but it made it very obvious he wanted to do more than just that. How could he? I had a hard time wrapping my head around why he would even attempt to do something like that, even after Dooo and I made it very clear how we felt about each other. Did he simply not care? Or did he just want me to change my mind about it? If that's the case, he'd better just give up. I'd never do anything to purposefully sabotage the relationship I've built with Dooo. Not just our dating relationship, but our friendship as well. What would Dooo say if he knew? Does he even remember last night?

I was snapped out of my thoughts by a small groan from my sleeping beauty. "My head hurts." He whined, burying is face into the arm of mine he was holding.

"Well, that's what happens when you drink yourself silly, Princess." I said back in a low voice, not wanting to agitate his headache.

"It was /your/ idea." He groaned. I chuckled. 

"Here, let me get you some water and Tylenol." I gently kissed the back of his neck and got up, walking out of the room and down the steps. And who should I find in the kitchen but Blarg, munching on some toast? "Morning." I said flatly, trying my best to be civil.

"Don't worry, I'm leaving in a few minutes." He said sharply. "Dooo up already?"

"Yep. About as hungover as you'd expect." I smiled to myself, filling a glass with water.

"Are we gonna talk about last night?" Blarg asked, moving right up behind me at the sink. "About us?" I felt his hand snake its way around my hip and I set the glass down a little harder than I meant to.

"There's nothing to talk about." I tried keeping my composure. Was he really still trying to do this? He turned me around, facing him. He was a lot closer to my height than Dooo was, though I still towered over him. I towered over everyone. "I told you, we weren't gonna talk about it anymore and that I wanted you out of my house today."

Blarg looked down and fiddled with the long strings on my sweatpants, my absence of a shirt making me feel very naked all of a sudden. "You have to admit it was pretty nice though, wasn't it?" He looked back up at me; a sultry look in his eyes. "You know, you can just admit to me that you wanted more, McNasty." That's it. I grabbed his wrists, holding them up to either side of us, getting close to his face.

"You need to leave. I don't want you here. I don't want you in my house, I don't want you near my boyfriend, I don't want you near me. We're done, Matt. I will be civil to you to save face with our friends, but we are done." I practically growled at him. This whole situation was just absurd. I was only thankful that Dooo was upstairs.

In an instant, Matt spun us around; moving his hands down and grabbing my wrists, pushing both of us backwards until I was leaned against the island, making me brace myself on the countertop on either side of my hips. He kept a firm grip on my wrists but nothing I couldn't pull away from. But now he was uncomfortably close to my face, his knee making its way between my legs. He said nothing. He just kept looking me over. I knew he knew that I was getting a little nervous and, as much as I didn't want to admit it, a little excited. After what felt like forever, he looked up into my eyes, his gaze hard and solemn. "You know I can please you in ways he can't, Eric." Matt's voice was low, sending shivers down my spine. "I know what you like. I know how to make you feel good." He pushed closer to me, our chests practically touching, and picked up one of my hands and hovered it above his hips. It was like he was waiting for me to make the decision if I wanted to continue this or not. My dick said yes, but my soul screamed no. My brain played visions of Dooo and how stunningly adorable he was whenever he did anything. Matt must've felt my body relax, because as soon as it did, he pushed against me and his lips were on mine again. I submitted for the smallest of a second and caved, putting my hand on his hip and closing my eyes. 

"E-Eric?" Time seemed to stop for a few seconds as my blood went cold at the sound of the familiar voice. 

Matt threw himself away from me, looking at the entryway to the kitchen like a deer caught in the headlights. "Dooo!" He gasped, looking from me to the door. I felt my heart start to crack like glass under pressure. Turning my head to the doorway, I saw a very scruffy Dooo, tears already streaking down his face, staring straight back at me. "I just, we weren't-" Matt tried. 

"Get out." I whispered, directing it towards Matt. Dooo's face twisted as he looked over at the other man. "GeT OUT!" I screamed as loud as I possibly could, turning my head to him as well. Eyes still wide, I saw a few tears fall down his face. 

"Wait, please," He turned his attention back to Dooo. "Dooo, I can explain."

"Explain what?" Doo's voice cracked. I looked back at him. "Explain that, after I was the ONLY one to try and make things right with you, you turn around and pull a fucking stunt like this?" He pointed between Matt and me. "I thought I could handle you having feelings for him. But I also thought we were friends." Matt opened his mouth to say something, but Dooo cut him off. " Just fucking leave! I fucking hate you!" With that, Matt only nodded before running out of my house. After the door closed, Dooo turned towards me. 

"Eric, I-"

"Don't even, Eric." He held up his hand. "You sure looked like you were having a hard time trying to stop him!"

"Please, believe me, I tried to. I tried to yesterday and I tried to today, I just...he got the upper hand and I caved." I tried wiping the tears from my eyes before they fell. "And I know that is nowhere NEAR a good enough excuse for what just happened but I swear...I swear on everything I believe in that I thought of nothing but you." He was silent, no longer looking at me. "Eric...." I slowly moved towards him, like he would run away if I moved to quick, until I stood over him. I knelt down on both knees and hugged him, my head against his chest. I heard his heart beating a slow, sad rhythm. "Eric, I'm so sorry. I'm so, so, so sorry." I let my tears fall freely. 

"Don't...EVER...do anything like this again, McNasty." His voice was so quiet it was almost a whisper. "Or we are fucking over. Do you understand?"

"Yes, yes, a thousand times yes." My lower lip quivered and I snuggled my head into him more. I fucked up. I know I fucked up. I don't know if I've ever fucked up this badly. But, to my great relief, Dooo wrapped his arms around my head, twisting his fingers through my hair. "Please don't be upset with me for too long. Please? I don't expect you to forgive me right away but I don't want you to be upset with me for a long time either."

He was quiet for a minute. "We'll see, McNasty." We stayed like that for a little bit, just absorbing everything that happened this morning. I can't imagine how he felt. Being hungover and then witnessing your boyfriend being practically rubbed on by a mutual friend. Which, I don't think Matt is ever going to gain Dooo's or my trust back. I guess we're going to have to be civil towards him, seeing as how neither of our other two friends know about the situation. Well, they don't know everything. But we can't let the podcast suffer when we've built this audience who's likes our content, right? It's not like we have to be together in person anymore, so it'll be easier. Dooo patted my head a few times before pulling away. "Do you still have any Tylenol? My head is pounding like a bitch right now."

"Of course, my love." I got up, stopping for a second after both knees popped, and made my way to the cabinet to get Dooo some pain meds. When I turned back around, he was sat on the island counter; rubbing his eyes and swinging his feet idly. "Here." I kissed his forehead as I handed him the pills and water. I situated myself between his knees, mindlessly tracing my fingers along his thighs as he downed the water. I noticed he had one of my hoodies on, and I absolutely fell in love with the way he swam in it. Metaphorically that is. "Feel better?" 

"Mmhm." He nodded as he fell forward, wrapping his arms around me. I returned the favor; wrapping my arms back around him and promptly placing a kiss on the top of his head. "Will you carry me back upstairs, please?" He asked sleepily. 

"Yes, Princess." I turned around between his legs; letting him wrap his legs around my hips and his arms around my shoulders before holding the back of his knees and picking him up off the counter. "Are you holding on?" I asked, waiting for an answer before making my way back to my room. When I got a nod, I walked to the stairs, feeling his grip tighten as I walked up them. When we got to my room, I turned around and backed up against the bed. Dooo let go and fell back onto the bed. 

"That was a lot father down than I thought it would be!" He laughed, sitting back up in the bed. 

"Are you good?" I asked, laying down in my spot. 

"Yeah I'm good." Dooo curled up against me and I pulled the covers up over his shoulders. "Hey, McNasty?"

"Yeah?"

"You're an idiot." I felt him chuckle a little bit and I chuckled in return. I know I'm an idiot, but I'd be a bigger idiot if I ever did anything to lose him.

"I love you too, Dooo."


	8. Chapter 8: Dooo Takes Control

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is back in Dooo's POV. Smut warning!

When I woke up for the second time today, McNasty was still asleep and someone was pounding at the door. "Wake up, shit heads, we're hungry!" Soup called through the door. Today was the last day they were going to be here.

"We're coming!" I called, sitting up in bed. The memories of that morning hit me like a fucking freight train. I desperately tried to push the thoughts out of my head, but I just couldn't. How do you forget something like that? "McNasty, wake up." I shook him. 

"I'm up, I'm up." He moaned, sitting up with me.

The door opened. "You guys have been sleeping all damn day!" Soup and Grizzy came into the room. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, we're good." McNasty answered.

"Oh yeah? We heard shouting this morning and Blarg is gone." Grizzy crossed his arms. "Wanna tell us what's up with that?"

McNasty and I looked at each other, no doubt thinking the same thing. 

"We can tell you over dinner." The man in bed with me got up, putting clothes on. "I wanna take you guys somewhere special, so get ready for the best meal you'll ever eat!"

~At the restaurant~

We sat down at a fancy grill place. I say "fancy", but really it was the just the kind of place you'd take your crush to on a first date to try and impress them. We ordered some drinks and sat in silence, trying our best to ignore the obnoxious pink metaphorical elephant in the room. 

"So are you gonna tell us what happened now?" Soup asked, taking a sip of his drink. McNasty and I nervously looked at each other. 

"We'll tell you, but we want you guys to know something first." McNasty started.

"We don't want it to affect the podcast, or our Siege videos, or anything else." I added. "I don't think its something we can get over super easy, but we can get over it enough to make content." The other two nodded slowly, not sure where we were going with this.

"Blarg kissed me." McNasty said a little quick. Soup and Grizzy's eyes went wide for a second.

"He did what now?" Grizzy asked.

"He kissed me. Pinned me up against the counter and just straight up kissed me." More silence. 

"Is that what all the yelling was about?" Soup asked.

"Yeah." McNasty sipped his drink before continuing. "I told him to get the fuck out of my house, and we haven't seen or heard from him since."

Before we could talk more, our very nice waitress lady came back with our food.

"Have either of you heard from him?" I asked after she left, curious if he was okay.

"I haven't." Soup shrugged, looking at Grizzy.

"Me neither." Grizzy said before taking a bite of his food.

We ate and started joking around, trying to relive the tension. It worked, but I couldn't help but think of the way McNasty melted into Blarg this morning. It was hard to get the scene out of my head, and I couldn't help but wonder if maybe...he was attracted to Blarg having the upper hand. But...if that was the case...then that was all I had to do to ensure he'd stay with me, right? I kept sneaking glances at him, hoping he wouldn't notice I was doing so. 

If that's all it took was a little dominance to ensure he'd stay with me, how hard could it be?

When we got back to McNasty's house, we all played games for a few hours before Soup and Grizzy went to bed, seeing as how they had a flight in the morning. Being a day early, I was also leaving a day late. McNasty and I sat in silence after they left. 

"So...are you ready for bed?" He rolled his head on his shoulders to look at me.

"Yeah, I guess so." I lied. I was the exact opposite of 'ready for bed'. I didn't want to sleep. I just wanted to stay there with him and make him tell me he loves me and he isn't going to leave me. But how could I? How do you even say something like that to someone? It should be simple, but I'd just come off as clingy or some weird shit. Regardless of how I felt inside, I followed the tree of a man up the stairs and into bed. The lucky bastard fell asleep almost immediately while I laid awake, hopelessly closing my eyes to try and sleep a little bit.

~Later that night~

McNasty was fast asleep beside me, but I've never been more awake. My mind swarmed like the inside of a hornets nest that was getting attacked by rocks. And who's throwing the rocks? Some fat little kid with one front tooth and his gaggle of bully friends that like to push other kids off the teeter-totter. But here's the thing...you can't attack a hornets nest and expect to come out unscathed. So, I either let the children throw rocks at me, or I release the hornets.

I'm releasing the hornets.

"McNasty." I whispered, nudging his back. "McNasty, wake up."

"Wha?" He groaned, turning his head slightly.

"Dude, wake the fuck up." I whispered a little louder, sitting up in bed.

"What time is it?"

"Does it matter?" I asked, pulling back on his shoulder to make him lay on his back. "Just wake up." When he was fully on his back, I crawled over top of him and straddled his hips.

"I guess not, Princess." I saw a glint of light reflect off his eyes in the darkness as he opened them to look at me. "Is someone excited?" He thrusted his hips up into me, making a small groan escape my throat.

"H-hey, none of that!" I tried my best to sound intimidating. "I'm in charge tonight, okay? You do what I tell you to!" To my utter horror and complete surprise, McNasty started laughing. "Stop that!" I lightly hit his chest as I felt my cheeks start to go red with embarrassment. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He started to get control of himself. "You wanna be in charge? Then you go right ahead, Princess."

I hit him again, not using much force. "You call me Sir! And I will, but not because you gave me permission!" I moved myself from on his lap to in between his legs, leaning back over him to kiss him. He was sweet about it at first, no doubt from just waking up, but I started to get more into it when he put his hands through my hair. I reached down between us, gently stroking the growing bulge in his boxers. "Get up." I instructed, getting off of him and standing beside the bed. He did as I said, and sat at the edge of the bed. I mimicked what he did to me our first time; separating his legs with my knee and moving in-between them. Although, we were practically face-to-face in this position. McNasty quirked his eyebrow, no doubt knowing exactly what I was going to tell him to do. "Get my dick out and suck it."

"Yes, Sir." Getting down on his knees, sitting on his legs, McNasty pulled my dick out of my boxers and licked from base to tip before putting it in his mouth. The wet heat of his mouth caught me off guard, making me grab his hair for support. He started sucking, taking me deeper into his mouth, using his tongue to coat it in his saliva. 

"Fuck...move." I almost begged, but remembered I was in charge now. I moved my hips back and forth, holding his head in place. He relaxed his throat; allowing me easy access to it. I looked down, regretting it almost instantly. The way he was looking up at me sent an absolute shockwave of arousal through my entire body. I moved a little faster, fully throat-fucking him until he pushed back on my hips. McNasty let off with a /pop/, innocently looking up at me.

"Am I doing good, Sir?" He asked. He wasn't sarcastic about it, but there was a tone in his voice that reminded me that I, in fact, was not in control. 

"So good, baby." I stroked the side of his face, taking a step back and leaning down to plant a firm kiss on his lips. "I want you to lean over the bed." He did as he was told; laying his torso over the bed and presenting his ass to me. I got down on my knees behind him, taking his hard cock into my hand and stroking it gently.

"What're you do-Ah!" Without giving him any warning, I just went directly for his asshole. Never in my life had I thought I'd be eating McNasty's ass, but here I was; prodding his hole with my tongue and, oddly enough, enjoying the way he twisted around under me. He didn't tell me to stop or push me away, so I kept doing it. "Fuck, Dooo~" He moaned, reaching back and fisting my hair. As I licked his hole, my hand worked on stroking his cock; sliding my thumb around the tip that was starting to leak precum out of it. Once I had made him an absolute moaning mess, I stood and reached in to his bedside drawer and pulled out a bottle of lube.

"Such a good boy." I cooed, rubbing the gel all over my dick before applying some to his hole as well. "Are you ready?" I asked, lining myself up.

"Yes, Sir." With that, I slowly pushed the head of my dick in, letting him get used to the sensation. "Keep going, Dooo, please?" He started to push back on me, but I placed my hands firmly on his hips to stop him from doing so.

"Who's in charge?" I asked, pushing more in at an agonizingly slow pace.

"You." He groaned.

"Damn right I am." I smiled to myself, pulling out and pushing back in. I started slow with my thrusts, but quickly picked up the pace. His tight ass felt so fucking good around my dick. After getting more vigorous, I reached forward and put my hand around his throat; pulling him back up to me. He put his hand on mine but didn't make me pull it away. "Flip over." I panted, never wanting someone so badly in my life.

"Yes, Sir." McNasty pulled off of me and rolled over onto his back on the bed. I took his tree trunk sized legs and put one on my shoulder; holding the other one by my hip. The sight of him alone almost made me bust. Flushed, disheveled, panting, swollen cock just aching to be touched. And right before I put my dick back in, a panic started to spread in my mind like a drop of food coloring in a glass of water. "Dooo?" McNasty sat on his elbows, looking at me. I suddenly remembered why we were in that position. Why I was in control. But most of all, the reason I felt I needed to be in control. 

A panic that I couldn't explain set in. It felt like I was drowning in the oxygen of this room and the pressure of it was crushing me. My head spun as all my theories and my fears and my worries rushed into the forefront of my mind. And then...

I started crying.

I put McNasty's legs down and ran into the bathroom; ignoring him calling after me. I sat myself on the tub side and put my head in my hands. What was I doing? What was I /thinking/? What was I even trying to prove? I cried harder, not caring if it woke up all of California. 

After a few minutes, there was a knock at the door. "Dooo? Dooo, I'm coming in." McNasty opened the door and walked in. "Hey, are you okay? What happened?" He spoke to me like I was a child. Then again, I felt like I was being a bit of a baby at the moment. 

"I'm sorry, McNasty. I'm sorry for everything." I sniffed and wiped the tears from my eyes.

"Sorry for what? For freaking out a little bit ago?"

"No I just..." I had to come clean at some point, right? "I saw how you reacted when Blarg dominated you, McNasty. I saw everything. The way you just...caved to him. I figured, if I could be as in-charge as he was, you wouldn't ever want to leave me. I could be perfect for you instead of just okay for you." 

"First, shut the fuck up." He wasn't mad, but I could see his eyes get a little wet. "Second, you are perfect for me, Dooo. I caved out of a moments weakness, not because I was into him dominating me. Third, I never, EVER, expect you to be anything but the adorable little guitar nerd you've always been." He wrapped his arms around me in a tight hug. "I care about you so much, Dooo. Don't ever underestimate how I feel about you. I know I fucked up with the whole Blarg situation, but I never ever want to do anything that will hurt you again." I could only hug him tighter. How was it possible to be any more in love with this man?

"Thank you, McNasty."

"You're welcome, Princess." He let me go and cupped my face, wiping the leftover tears. "Are you okay now?" I nodded, offering him a small smile. 

"Yeah, I'm good now."

"Good." He smirked, standing up with me in tow. "Because I'm about to show you how a real top eats ass."


	9. Update

Hey! So I'm at a loss for where to take this or if I even want to continue it. I'm keeping it open just in case I decide I want to finish it at 10 chapters, which was the original plan when I started this fic. I think it left off at a pretty good spot to end and it's kinda up to you where Blarg ended up after the last fight. I might write for other fandoms or I might continue in this one just in a separate story, but it might not be for a while. Thank you for the support, and I hope you're having a great day! <3


	10. Chapter 9: A Blarg-Priced Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dooo and McNasty go on an expensive date and have a romantic night before Dooo has to go home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER: I had to do some research for the restaurant they went to and I have NO idea about fine dining or fancy Californian things. I'm just guessing and kinda just making them do things that sound fancy to me. I still hope you enjoy this chapter though!

McNasty and I woke up early to take Grizzy and Soup to the airport. "Have either of you heard anything from Blarg?" I asked as I shut the trunk of McNasty's car. 

"I texted him to see if he was okay and all he said was 'yeah'." Soup responded, situating himself in the back seat. 

"Well at least he's alright." I said more to myself than anyone else. I claimed my spot in the front and McNasty made sure everyone had on their seatbelts before pulling out of the driveway. The ride to the airport was filled with laughs and jokes as we recounted all the fun times we had at the house. Soup and Grizzy brought up my drunken and high adventures. It was all news to me! I don't really remember anything about that night. 

After we dropped them off, the ride home was silent. 

"Are you ready for tonight?" McNasty asked, putting his hand on my knee. 

"What're we doing tonight?" I asked, leaning my head over the middle to rest on his shoulder. 

"We are going to have the most romantic night of your life is what we're doing." My brows furrowed and I lifted my head to look at him. He just had that stupid smirk on his face while he kept his eyes ahead. My mind raced with ideas of what McNasty would consider "romantic". Guitar shopping? Homemade dinner? He always struck me as the more emotionally romantic type rather than a material romantic type. You know; pet names, small touches, putting his partners feelings first. He didn't seem like the candles and wine at a fancy restaurant type. 

We pulled into the driveway and McNasty put the car in park before leaning over and kissing my cheek. "Why don't you go take a shower and get ready, Princess? You don't wanna be late, do you?"

"Late to what?" I asked hopefully. He only smiled and got out of the car. "Late for what??" I repeated, following him into the house.

"Just hop in the shower. I'll get your clothes ready."

~15 minutes later, in McNasty's bathroom~ 

I stepped out of the shower, grabbing a towel and drying myself off. I looked at myself in the mirror. Purple bruises from this weeks events dotted my torso and hips. I couldn't see them, but I knew there were a few on the inside of my thighs that McNasty had left last night. I smiled to myself. I wished he'd make at least one mark that others could see. One mark so when people looked at us they knew exactly what was going on. Just one. Sighing, I wrapped the towel around my waist and made my way to McNasty's room.

When I opened the door, a soft yellow glow caught me off guard. "What the-?" Upon further inspection, a line of rose petals and fake electric candles lined the floor leading to my boyfriends bed. The bed itself had more petals on it and a pile of clothes neatly folded on the corner. Mouth agape, I walked to the pile and realized that it was a suit; black pants, black belt, buttoned shirt, red tie, and shoes in my size waited for me. I put them on, my heart racing in my chest at the anticipation of what tonight would bring. 

When I left McNasty's room, I took note of the same little candles spaced out a bit more leading my down the stairs. I swallowed and went down. 

McNasty was sitting on the couch with his back to me. Real, on-fire candles flickered on the coffee table in front of him. "Eric?" I asked when I reached the bottom of the stairs. McNasty leaned his head back to look at me, smiled, then stood. He was wearing clothes similar to mine, except he had a suit jacket and a tasteful green tie. I felt my face burst a bright pink as I looked him over. He looked SO fucking good! The suit slimmed him out just right and he looked absolutely-

"Beautiful." He smirked, snapping me out of my trance. "You look amazing." McNasty picked up a bouquet of roses from the couch and handed them to me.

"When did you have time to do all this? How did you get this stuff without me noticing??" I was completely bewildered. No one had ever gone through this much trouble for me. 

"You're a very heavy sleeper, and there are 24-hour stores all over the place." He admitted sheepishly. I took the roses and set them down, practically jumping into his arms. "Don't get too emotional yet, Dooo. We gotta get goin'." McNasty hugged me back for a moment before taking my hand and leading me out to the car.

We drove. I'm not sure for how long, or where we were even going. "Now, Dooo, I want you to listen to me very closely." McNasty got serious all of a sudden. "Tonight, I want you to get whatever the fuck you want, and I don't wanna hear a damn thing about the prices. Understand?"

My heart thumped to a stop in my chest. "Wha? Where are you taking me?" I was hoping he just wanted to get dressed up and go to, like, Taco Bell or something. Was he taking me somewhere expensive? "McNasty, where are we going?"

"You'll see. But you have to promise me you'll just have fun and not worry about it. Okay?"

I thought for a moment. If he was really going through all this trouble for me, I guess I don't have much of a choice but to comply, right? "Alright, McNasty. I won't worry about it."

We drove for a little longer until finally McNasty stopped by this little white and orange brick building. A place called "Capo" according to the sign on the side. A lady stood outside the door behind a small box, talking to an older couple dressed up before someone else came out to take them inside. McNasty opened my car door for me and I got out, standing beside him while he locked his car and held out his arm for me to take. I rolled my eyes at the man before taking it, letting him lead me up to the lady at the box.

"Benvenuta! Welcome to Capo! Do you have a reservation?" She smiled at us. McNasty stated his name, she checked her list, and spoke into her little headset before smiling at us again. "Your table is all ready for you, Sir!" As if on cue, the same man who lead the older couple inside opened the door and motioned for us to follow him. My jaw dropped to the floor as we entered; high beamed ceilings, white clothed tables covered in wine glasses, folded napkins, polished silverware, small clusters of roses, and lit candles covered the floor. There was a small bar with a large assortment of wines off along the wall. Everyone there was dressed up. 

When the waiter led us to the table, McNasty pulled out a chair and motioned for me to sit down. I complied, and wearily watched him as he sat down. What kind of place was this? I picked up the menu, which was covered in weird cursive font, and opened it. The first page had a greeting and a list of local farms they used to get their ingredients from. I opened it more and it took absolutely everything I had in me not to cause a scene right then and there. 

"Eric!" I hissed between my teeth quietly.

"Yeah?" He responded nonchalantly, not looking up at me.

"What the hell kind of place is this?" I asked, looking back over the menu to make sure I wasn't dreaming. 

"Dooo, you promised you wouldn't make a big deal out of this." How was he so calm?? 

"But...but...." McNasty huffed, closed his menu, and looked at me.

"Do you honestly think I would ever set foot in a place like this if I didn't want to? That I'd take you somewhere I'd have to pay more than $5 for a meal for the two of us if I didn't want to spend that much?" At this point I couldn't help but wonder if someone took over McNasty's body. This was a whole new side of him I never knew existed. 

"I...I guess not." I sighed, looking back down at the menu. The most expensive appetizer was $35!

The waiter came back with some water and asked if we would like anything to start off with. "Yes, two salads please. I think we need more time to look things over." McNasty answered. After a few minutes, McNasty set his menu down. "I think we should get the tasting menu. It's like getting everything but its spread out in small portions." I only nodded. If he was offering then that must be what he wants, right?

The waiter came back and McNasty ordered for us; adding in some fancy wine I didn't know he could read the name of.

Over the next hour, the waiter brought us plates of little things; describing each one with care and making sure we were satisfied before walking away. The food was actually incredible! Each plate was nicely portioned so we didn't get too full, and we both ended up being pleasantly satisfied. Before the waiter came back for us to pay, the old couple from the door came by our table. "You boys have a nice evening." The woman winked as they walked by. McNasty and I shared the same expression as we looked from her to each other before busting out in small giggles.

The sun was set lower in the sky when we walked outside. The ocean was so close. "Wanna take a walk, Princess?" McNasty asked. I looked up at him to find him already looking at me. "I know the perfect spot." He opened my car door once again and I got in; watching the world go by until we got to a place down the street called Ocean View Park. When we got out of the car, my face was blasted with salty air from the ocean. It wasn't unpleasant, though. It was...relaxing. 

McNasty took his suit jacket and tie off before we walked down, hand-in-hand. 

As we walked around my mind raced. How in the absolute hell did I manage to entangle my life with McNasty's anyways? What did he see in me that made him want to spend all this money and all this time on? That he sacrificed his friendship with Blarg? The more I thought about it, the more a contradictory statement made it's way to the forefront of my mind. What did /I/ see in /him/? To let him spend all this time and money on me? To let him sacrifice his friendship with Blarg? But, that wasn't my choice to make, was it?

I did think of an answer. Our respect for each other. The way we make each other feel. His humor and the way he laughs, how he makes my heart beat faster, how everything just seems so simple with him around. When I'm with him, I feel like I could take on the world. I want to be the one with him through all life's greatest moments, as well as the worst. I want to be the one he can come to when he's not happy, or is happy, or is sick, or even scared. I want to be with him for everything. I want to be his. I guess that's how he feels about me too. 

"You alright?" He asked, stopping in front of me.

"Never better." I smiled up at him. He hugged me, kissing my head, and looked out at the ocean. I looked out too, amazed by how small I felt in comparison to the body of water. But I wasn't scared. I was ready. Ready for whatever life had to throw at me. Whatever it had, except....

"Dooo, are you crying?" He pushed me back a little and looked at me. My body shook with sobs at the realization that this would be my last night with him for a long while at least. 

"Do I have to leave?" I asked, trying to calm myself down.

McNasty smiled sympathetically, holding me close to him once more. "I know, Princess, its okay. It may be a few months, but you cant keep me away from you forever." I smiled at that, calming down more. "I love you, Dooo."

"I love you too, McNasty."


	11. Chapter 10: Exposing the Erics

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning towards the end of the chapter!

It had been a week since we all had been at McNasty's house. Being home without him has been pretty fucking lonely if I'm being honest. On the bright side, we've been snapchatting and video calling a lot more. My parents weren't the least bit surprised when I told them about me and McNasty and unloaded the entirety of my trip on them. All except the sex bits, of course. 

It was podcast night, and to do something special for the audience, we decided to livestream it for an hour or so and had Grizzy as a special guest. As I was setting up, my phone buzzed with a new notification.

Soup: Everyone ready? No problems tonight?

Grizzy: I'm ready

McNasty: Me too

Me: No problems on my end

Blarg read the notifications but didn't reply. He didn't say much unless he was directly spoken to, but even then it was short answers.

Soup: No problems right Blarg?

Blarg: No. Just start this fucking thing so we can get it over with please

A few moments later, the stream was started, and we had five minutes to let people gather up before we officially started. Every second that passed more and more people joined in. As the number went up, so did my heart rate. I was nervous to hear Blarg again. 

At last the stream officially started, and McNasty's voice rang out while he did the into. "WELcome back to the Goons Podcast! The only podcast where you have a 99.9% chance of listening to four morons talk about shit!" Everyone sighed and Grizzy and Soup ended up laughing.

"That's how we're starting? That's really how we're starting?" Blarg sounded like he always had. For a moment I had forgotten about the animosity between us. He really must've been forcing it. 

"I mean he's not wrong." I chimed in, giving in and laughing along with my friends.

The podcast went on like normal. It really felt like we were all friends and there was nothing going on outside of it. We had a few good topics to talk about and we had some good bits going. About 30 minutes in, Blarg decided to change the topic.

"So, uh, Dooo and McNasty? How's the long distance relationship going? Ya know, since you're dating now and everything." My heart stopped at the question and silence followed. The way Blarg said that made it very obvious he still hated the face that we were together. The chat was bombarded with speculations, accusations, congratulations, and questions.

"Blarg, come on-" Soup started.

"No, Soup, it's fine." McNasty interrupted, a snarky tone to his voice. "It's not exactly how I was planning on coming out to my audience but fuck it! Yes, chat, Dooo and I are dating. We have been for the last few weeks, and it has been going very well. And yes, we had sex, and we made sure everyone heard it." There was no joking to McNasty's voice. 

"Glad to know you queers are still as loud as ever." Blarg said in a tone that matched McNasty's.

"You know what, Blarg?" I got pissed and didn't try to hide it. "I've got a question for you. How's /your/ life going? Ya know, since you kissed my boyfriend AFTER you found out we were dating, got the shit beaten out of you and thrown out of McNasty's house for calling us fa*ggots, going behind my back and making a move on McNasty after I was the ONLY one to try and make amends with you for what happened, got thrown out again, AND losing at least two of your best friends? Hm? How are YOU doing, Blarg? Because right now I can assure you that McNasty and I are doing VERY well, despite the distance, while you still seem to be so insecure in your own feelings that you tried outing us to people who literally write fanfiction about McNasty and I getting together, and you think they're gonna hate us? Look at the fucking chat, Blarg. Congratulations, you played yourself." My face felt hotter than it did before. The chat spammed with support for McNasty and I, but also a lot of hate on Blarg. 

After a long, almost uncomfortable pause, Soup spoke first with a soft laugh. "What the fuck just happened?"

"I am extremely turned on is what just happened." McNasty laughed, back to his original jokey self. 

"You know what?" Blarg's voice cracked. "Fuck you guys." And just like that, he was gone. 

The podcast continued like normal, with Grizzy taking Blarg's place. The tension that was there was gone, and everyone seemed to be more relaxed. 

At last, the podcast ended, and I was about to turn my computer off when I got a skype notification from McNasty.

McNasty: Wanna video call? ;)

Me: Kinda tired

McNasty: I've been hard this whole podcast. Don't leave me hard like this Princess ;)

The skype jingle played as McNasty called, and I just sighed and answered. I was greeted with a headless, shirtless McNasty.

"Aw, no face cam?" I fake pouted in my UwU voice. 

"Are you gonna turn yours on?" He asked, leaning back in his chair; his hard dick prominent in his pants.

I bit my lip. "Hm...maybe it might be more fun like this." I leaned back, mimicking him, and started rubbing on my thigh. 

"Take your clothes off." He instructed, tracing the outline of his dick through his pants. I sat up and arched my back, slowly taking my shirt off. Throwing that on the floor, I stood up and turned around; pulling my shorts down and making sure to give him a show of it. Turning back around, I did the same thing with my boxers, revealing my half hard dick. "Fuck you're so pretty." McNasty groaned, watching me sit back down.

"Your turn, babe." I leaned back again, slowly stroking myself. McNasty complied, standing and taking his pants off. His lack of underwear obvious as his cock sprung out. My face flushed as I remembered how he felt inside of me. 

"Sit on your knees on your chair, ass facing me, Princess." He instructed. I moved the arms of my chair out of the way and did as I was told, holding the keyboard next to me so I didn't swivel out of the way. I arched my back a little more to present myself better to him. "Go ahead and touch yourself if you want to." I nodded, forgetting he couldn't see my head, and started to stroke myself. I heard him shuffle for a second before hearing soft, wet slapping sounds. I turned slightly to try and confirm my suspicions. "You can turn to the side if you wanna watch."

"Thank you." I nearly groaned, facing my ass to the door and sitting on my legs more. He was sprawled out a little more than before, dick on full display, but I could see the lower half of his face. Watching his mouth open and close slightly as he lost himself in pleasure turned me on so fucking much. "I wish I was there." I moaned, leaning back and reaching my hand down to my ass.

"Wanna play a little harder, Princess?" He smiled, licking his lips slightly.

"Fuck yes." I smiled back, awaiting his command. "What'd you have in mind?"

"Do you have lotion?"

"Well, yeah." I grabbed the bottle of lotion next to my bed and showed it to him. 

"Lube up your fingers and ride them like you'd ride me." He slowed down his strokes as he watched me do as I was told.

I rested my arm on one of my legs and lowered myself onto two of my fingers, letting out a small moan as I moved back up and down again. I tilted my head back and looked over, noticing McNasty was following my movements on his shaft. I picked up the pace, wanting so badly for my fingers to be him instead. I started stroking myself again, letting myself get lost in pleasure. Pretty soon I was bouncing on my fingers, unaware of how loud I was being while I neared the edge of my orgasm.

"McNasty~" I moaned. He clutched the arm of his chair while he kept up with my pace on his dick, breathing heavily.

"Cum for me, Princess~" He gasped back. I leaned forward onto the back of my chair, vigorously fingering my ass while I stroked my dick, biting the fabric to try and quiet myself down. McNasty starting groaning as he came, and the sight set me off. I reached the threshold of ecstasy and started cumming into my hand.

"Hey, Eric do you- OH MY G-WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?" My door swung open with absolutely no warning, fear making me jump and turn in my chair, fight or flight in full effect. There at the door, mom stood in horror as she stared at my face.

"MOM GET OUT! GET OUT!" I covered myself up, covered in my cum and still hard, and threw my shirt at her. She started stumbling over her words as she slammed the door shut, leaving me alone again. My heart thumped in every part of my body and I felt like I was on fire. I was panting so hard but I had no idea if it was from the sheer embarrassment or the post-nut exhaustion. When I snapped back in to reality, McNasty was losing his absolute shit and laughing his ass off.

"Dude what the fuck just happened?" He struggled to say between sobs of laughter. "Did that really just happen?!"

"You know what? I think I'm ready to move out." I cleaned myself off and put my clothes back on, laughing a little bit. 

"You can always come live with me." McNasty suggested, starting to clean himself off.

"I might have to." I put my head in my hands, trying to get the image of my mother seeing me pleasuring myself out of my head. "McNasty?" I groaned, looking over at him just as he pulled his shorts back on.

"Yeah, Princess?"

"Please...don't EVER...bring this up to the guys." I said that, but I know full well one of us is gonna bring it up at some point. 

"Well, hey, at least it's not a joke anymore." He grinned, swinging in his chair.

"Nope." I agreed, leaning back and rubbing my eyes. "It is absolutely not a joke this time."


End file.
